Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
