i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
