why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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