Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
