so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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