He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
