laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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