White coat. Heels.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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