ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
