i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
