I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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