dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Randomize