I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm gonna have a badass scar
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Randomize
