her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
