If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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