I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize