You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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