My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
