We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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