So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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