i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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