My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize