Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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