can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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