how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Dear god my vagina.
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