OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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