Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
