'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
My ass is underappreciated
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
