We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
His hands were made for my vagina.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
