Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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