I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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