I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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