they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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