real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
