is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
