escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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