with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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