u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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