Ambien. No doubt about it.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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