I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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