i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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