Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
