batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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