You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
