we're blogging at a bar
It's Friday. Sex?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
