Is it because I queefed?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
