Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
3pm strippers are depressing
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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