I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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