so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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