God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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